Friday, July 31, 2009

Helping Your Child Recover from Sexual Abuse Review

For my husband and I, this book was reassuring that we're doing things right, which is truly not much of a comfort in this horrific time in our lives. Our oldest son sexually abused our youngest (9 years difference). This book didn't cover much at all on sibling sexual abuse but did cover very real issues like how important it is to BELIEVE your child and give them support, dealing with the responses from friends and family, handling your childs reactions and daily life, the legal system, grieving, self esteem, sexuality, dealing with the abuse as your child matures and trying to move on. As my title says, each section gives a guide/suggestion on things you could say to your child to help them in each situation. There were also some excercises that could be done with older children to help them process things out.

On a personal note, if you are having to look this subject up in Amazon, my heart goes out to you. We never would have expected to be in this "club" that no one wants to be in. There are so many emotions to deal with right now. I want to give this book 5 stars, however it didn't give me any specific info on sibling abuse or any new ideas and I truthfully am still at the stage that Im looking for "the answer" - the one thats going to make all this pain and suffering go away. I know I'll never find it, but, nevertheless.....

I think the book is a worthwhile read.

Buy it here now!

Thursday, July 30, 2009

In Their Own Words: A Sexual Abuse Workbook for Teenage Girls Review

As I Licensed Clinical Marriage and Family Therapist I ordered this workbook for use with adolescent and young adult clients who have experienced or are experiencing some form of sexual abuse. Many people who read books about abuse (or who even begin therapy to deal with abuse-related issues) often voice the common complaint that they don't find enough in the way of strategies that address the multi-faceted, roller-coaster-like feelings experienced during this critical time of healing. I have been quite pleased with this workbook, as it normalizes symptoms of hurt, fear, frustration, anger, etc. -- rather than making someone feel like an outcast as they deal with their state of "brokenness". In Their Own Words is a positive, solution-focused workbook that addresses every area one could imagine regarding sexual abuse -- highly recommended!

I am now purchasing several workbooks to keep in my office, just to have them on hand. While this workbook is designed to be used in conjunction with therapy, it may also be beneficial with good, qualified mentoring or in group settings that are therapeutic in nature. It is possible to use this workbook without being in therapy (although there are several exercises related to working through the abuse with a therapist); however, I would recommend additional guidance in the case of younger adolescents.

Buy it here now!

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The Courage to Heal Workbook: A Guide for Women and Men Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse Review

On the recommendation of my counselor I bought this workbook. I just recieved it and quickly read through it. My first impression is it is very touchy feely and has a lot of "How do you feel" kind of stuff over and over. I guess that is how a person can get in touch with what is bothering them, but it sorta turned me off to it. I'm still going to give it a try and see what will come of using it.

I did like the section on anger and forgiveness as this had some very helpful information. All I know is this whole healing process is confusing and a lot of hard work.

On the topic of forgiveness... I found the book "Forgive and Forget" very informative too. It also talks about what forgiveness really is all about. The Courage Workbook has a small section on this topic too that I found helpful.

What works for one person may not work for another, but you won't know if it will work for you unless you try it.

Buy it here now!

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

The Evaluation of Child Sexual Abuse Allegations: A Comprehensive Guide to Assessment and Testimony Review

The editors of this collection are experienced practitioners and teachers of forensic psychology. They have collected chapters written by nationally and internationally respected experts in applied research and practice to provide others with their best advice and knowledge on conducting evaluations for and testifying in court.

Buy it here now!

Monday, July 27, 2009

Encouragements for the Emotionally Abused Woman: Wisdom and Hope for Women At Any Stage of Emotional Abuse Recovery Review

I purchased this material, because I am in love with a woman who has suffered from emotional and sexual abuse as a child and I wanted to learn more about the subject. My hope was to learn about the topic, so as to be understanding and helpful to her, as our relationship progressed. Honestly, this has proven to be a difficult relationship, yet I would say the material has been rather helpful...written simply, and easy read. No 2 situations can be exactly the same, so not every point can be applied, that would be my only caution when reviewing the material. For anyone who has suffered from this tradgedy, my guess is this is valuable reading...for anyone wanting to understand the challenges of those who have, it is a good starting point to learn. However, more sources will be needed to grasp the challenges presented.

Buy it here now!

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Substance Abuse Prevention: The Intersection of Science and Practice Review

This is the most comprehensive and current book on the topic. It provides the basic information anyone working in prevention would need to do their work well. It is applicable to all areas of prevention, not only substance abuse prevention. Persons preparing for prevention specialist certification would gresatly benefit from this text.

Buy it here now!

Saturday, July 25, 2009

The Sexual Healing Journey: A Guide for Survivors of Sexual Abuse (Revised Edition) Review

I finally understand what was happening to me. This book helped me and my husband through this horrible ordeal. I am now able to communicate to him what I am feeling, he now undersands what I went through. I highly recommend to any survivor who is just beginning their journey of healing.

Buy it here now!

Friday, July 24, 2009

Seeking Safety: A Treatment Manual for PTSD and Substance Abuse Review

This manual clearly maps out a program for trauma victims struggling with Substance Abuse. Most programs are designed for one or the other. This manual clearly describes a program that integrates approaches to both issues. There is very little fluff (stories and experiences) with only important valuable information included. It is easy to read and not written as a term paper with lots of footnotes and references.

Buy it here now!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Violent Partners: A Breakthrough Plan for Ending the Cycle of Abuse Review

I have been working in the field of domestic abuse for over 15 years.
I am impassioned by the work that I do.
I agree with Dr. Mills that violence is transmitted through generations. I have always been frustrated by the fact that as soon as my colleagues , therapists that I respect, hear that there is violence in a family, they immediately resort to
a . Not wanting to work with the couple together and
b. Encouraging the couple to get divorced, when in fact most couples do not want to separate and
c. The therapist will allign with the female (victim?)before even investigating the dynamics of what is really going on with this family.

Linda Mills' book Violent Partners brings all of the issues that I have been struggling with to the forefront. I, also, thoroughly appreciated the fact that we heard Dr. Mills' voice in retelling her own personal story. My hope is that through Violent Partners we learn to give every member of a family involved in violence a voice to be heard.

I salute Linda for the courage to come forward to say the things that most of us in the field know to be the truth but are afraid to verbalize.
I believe this book gives hope to families that are in violent relationships, and lets them know they are not alone. We understand why they might stay and we can work with them to bring their relationship to a safe place where they can stay together.

Buy it here now!

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

It Happened to Me: A Teen's Guide to Overcoming Sexual Abuse (workbook) Review

I used this workbook in a tx group for teens dealing with history of sexual abuse. The workbook covers many relevant topics- shame/self blame, anger, the grooming process, why me?, future relationships/safety, and much more! I would assign a chapter for homework and found that the girls would come to group having finished much more than I assigned.

Buy it here now!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Breaking the Cycle of Abuse: How to Move Beyond Your Past to Create an Abuse-Free Future Review

Even at age 60 I continue to learn about the impact of intergenerational abuse infecting my family. Engel, a survivor of abuse herself, describes the various abuses and abusers, the impact on the victim, and suggests methods to counter the negative. Abusers are all around us, even the US Missile Defense Department. My unfortunate newphew's father describes him as a "bum who did nothing and emotionally abused her (girlfriend)" and is mystified by the adult child's behavior. The book unveils the secrets that perpetuate this behavior and how it goes unchecked.

Buy it here now!

Monday, July 20, 2009

Substance Abuse Counseling Review

Written for beginning level students, this text provides a good, practical overview of substance abuse counseling and addresses key issues early, including designing treatments to fit the individual needs of a client. This text emphasizes that substance-abusing clients and their families form a heterogeneous group that must be treated from an individualized perspective. The authors believe strongly that clients differ not only in the behaviors and consequences associated with their drug use but also in culture, gender, social environments, physical concerns, mental health and a host of other variables. Using an integrated approach, the authors describe innovative methods for meeting clients' needs through personalized assessment, treatment planning, and behavior change strategies and show students how to select the most effective treatment modalities for each client.

Buy it here now!

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Healing Spiritual Abuse: How to Break Free from Bad Church Experiences Review

Hello all , just wanna thank Ken blue the author of this book as almost every thing mentioned about leadership or the heirarchy in the church is what I had been sensing but never had enough spirit to challenge the congregation. But as I went searching for books for a dear friend, I stumbled upon this book and when I read them my heart Jumped with joy for it shared the same things I hid in my heart for years. And now I feel liberated and feel I am serving the Lord better.

A must for every one who want to serve the Lord Jesus and not follow systems developed by man.


Buy it here now!

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Child Abuse and Culture: Working with Diverse Families Review

I have been a forensic interviewer at a Children's Advocacy Center for 9 years now. I train in the area of Forensic interviewing and specifically Diversity. I cannot say enough about the importance of Ms. Fonte's work here. From the perspective of a CAC Forensic Interviewer she is speaking directly to me and my needs in the field with this work.

CAC Executive Directors will find this book invaluable for the Standard Criteria regarding Agency Cultural Competancy. The Standard itself is addressed directly in one full chapter. If you have read this book when your review comes around and worked with it in relation to your Agency, in my humble opinon you will be on the cutting edge of the available thought and practice of Cultural Competancy at your Center. You will get it even if you can't implement it in your area just yet. This is your primer, and a MUST READ for Agency Cultural Competancy.

Ms. Fontes does talk specifically about Puerto Rican and Latino cultures in this volume more so than others, but do not discredit any part of the book for that. There are FAR reaching concepts and a paridigum shift talked about in the introduction by Jon Contes as going beyond Cultural sensitivity into more of an action and result based competency. And the book lives up to that at minimum as a GREAT PLACE TO START.

This book should become a Standard Classic in our field along side of others like Lamb and Poole's book on interviewing from the 90s, and Shame on us in the field if it does not. An interviewer dare not walk in to court anymore without have read and understood Lamb and Poole at least where if fits historically in forensic interviewing. One day this book will be of the same kind of importance.

BRAVO and Thank You To Lisa.

Buy it here now!

Friday, July 17, 2009

Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence--from Domestic Abuse to Political Terror Review

This is an extremely knowledgeable, intelligent and comprehensive study of the enormous psychological impact of the trauma experienced by severely abused children and adults, and people who have close-up combat experience and other traumatic war-related experiences. It addresses chronic abuse as well as single horrific events. Dr. Herman's commitment to bringing relief of suffering through increasing the understanding of therapists, care-givers, loved ones and healers allows survivors to have greater hope for their recovery. This book also validates, in a critical way, the many and pervasive aspects of personal suffering endured by the survivors. Someone else has "spoken" the unspeakable, and in so doing, helps survivors reclaim their souls.

Buy it here now!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Healing the Trauma of Abuse: A Woman's Workbook Review

I was abused as a child and later continued to involve myself in relationships with emotionally abusive partners. I've been in and out of counseling for years, but I never realized how much the trauma of those younger years have impacted how I think, feel, and relate to experiences and people today. I purchased this book on the advice of my current counselor. I have to say that after a month of working in the workbook, I can already tell the difference in myself and my behavior. I would recommend this workbook to anyone who has been abused and is seeking to reclaim their lives from the hopeless heap of dispair and depression that so often occurs to those who have been vicitimzed.

Buy it here now!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Verbal Abuse Survivors Speak Out; On relationship and recovery Review

I bought this book and was shocked how much I was shaking my head and agreeing with what was written. The hard part... I was in one of these replationships and did not realize until I got out what it had done to my self esteem. If you have this in your hands... read it... and move on. Life it to good to allow someone to do this to you.

Buy it here now!

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Please Tell!: A Child's Story About Sexual Abuse (Early Steps) Review

My baby girl listened, but seemed distant. I pray that the signs I've seen and guessed them to be signs of abuse are wrong. I bought the books to read to my little girl so she will know that she can tell her Dad if Mommy's family is hurting her. I pray not, but will not take any chances, as my Ex's family abused her until she was taken and put into a foster home, and then a girls Home at age 13. She's mentally twisted. I was wrong to think I could help her. It all fell apart when we moved to Kansas to be close to her (what she claimed were the GOOD part of her family), They are NOT.

Buy it here now!

Monday, July 13, 2009

The Courage to Heal 4e: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse 20th Anniversary Edition Review

I read 'The courage to heal' about 15 years ago and at that time it was the only book that I found really helpful for healing from sexual abuse and incest. It was like meeting someone who understood what I had experienced and it was full of helpful ways to cope. The biggest benefit for me was reading other peoples stories and knowing I wasn't alone, I wasn't a freak, these things happened to other people too ..... and they survived. The courage to heal gave me great hope and I dipped into it again and again, when I was feeling wobbly or needed to clarify something. I also reccommended it to some of my friends.

Now 15 years on, I have come out the other side of my healing and I just bought the updated edition of 'The courage to heal'. It has helped me to see not only how far I've come, but how much more information about incest, abuse and its effects is available and how much more the subject is spoken about.

I'd like to thank Ellen Bass and Laura Davis for their courage in writing such a book and all of the women who shared their experiences.I think it's a great credit to them that their book is still so popular 20 years on.

Buy it here now!

Sunday, July 12, 2009

The Secret of Overcoming Verbal Abuse: Getting Off the Emotional Roller Coaster and Regaining Control of Your Life Review

"A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on his shoes."

I cannot stand by and let more lies about this book and Dr. Ellis be perpetrated. A "Shopper" from Tucson, Arizona a.k.a. tucsonshopper [review May 10, 2008] has sent lies halfway around the web while the truth is putting on its shoes on. These types of lies like other harsh reviews regarding this book are precisely the either/or black or white thinking that Dr. Ellis defines as neurotic thinking and such reviews often say more about the reviewers than the book, and bespeak a profound misunderstanding of Ellisian theory. Dr. Ellis' book is a nuanced, more objective, account than most books on the subject -- the books concrete people love to hate because this politically charged topic lends itself to the crooked thinking Ellis railed against in his lifetime. Fortunately, sound thinking is in place and the Tusconian is of the minority opinion, giving it a 2 star rating while the majority gave it 5 STAR rating. I will address a few key areas:

1) To refer to Dr. Ellis as a bully (interestingly there is no criticism of his coauthor Marcia Grad Powers - is gender a factor here?) is not only false but a ludicrous depiction of the world's most prolific psychologist, who was named by his peers as the most influential therapist of his time, and the most influential clinician in the history of the psychology in Canada and number two in the United States. Most bullies, or the bully perspective aren't highly respected by their peers. As "richard31416" brilliantly states in his May 11, 2004 review, the book, "In no way implies that there is a "right" or a "privilege" to abuse . . . it is clear from the context and the thrust of the book that the intended meaning is, `my partner, as a separate, free moral agent, is free to abuse me if he so chooses, even though it is wrong and destructive, and it is my job to decide how I will respond, since I can't control his choices or his behavior.'" Like Ellis/Powers' book this is a nuanced review that skirts absolutistic, immature thinking. Not "A Shopper" from Tucson who instead recommends Suzette Elgin's nuance-free title, "You can't say that to me!"

2) The Arizonan goes on to compare Ellis to, "an `antisocial' abuser, borderline, bi-polar, or "closet" narcissist" who is 'remorseless'" Which begs the question how many people with the above attributes dedicates their life to improving the lives of others and society as a whole while giving all the earnings from his books back to the Institute and making $14,000 a year? That does not sound like borderline, bipolar, etc., etc., etc. The "evidence" submitted includes twisting & distorting facts from Ellis' memoirs. The reviewer can twist perceptions but reality won't budge. However, rather than focus on the content of THIS book the reviewer diverts attention to another book, and fails to look the content of this book and try to hack away at his reputation. In fact, precious little in the "review" addresses any of the content the book, but feebly attempts to attack the persona of Ellis.

The rest of the review by Tucsonshopper is too vague to dignify with specifics, but it includes broadly dismissing humanistic psychology (which includes dozens of therapeutic modalities under it's umbrella) as morally relativistic. Quite a statement!

In conclusion, using the reviewer's twisted logic I suggest the following: Readers do yourself a favor, don't read any more of A "Shopper" from Tucson, Arizona a.k.a. tucsonshopper's reviews. I feel her character, based on her other reviews, (rather than the content of her of this one) discredit her validity. Her shoes aren't tied but her mind is, in knots.

Buy it here now!

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Sacrilege: Sexual Abuse in the Catholic Church Review

I want to congratulate Dr. Podles for a skillfully written, thoroughly annotated and meticulously edited volume which will serve as a model for investigative texts on any subject.

I am angry that there are dissidents promoting this as the work of a dissident. I believe Dr. Podles' motivation is the bitterness many of us have over the destruction of the church's credibility as a moral arbiter rather than a desire to turn the Catholic Church into a rococo version of the phony 'Metropolitan Community Church' which is the hope of many of the newspaper reporters who write on this topic. While he expresses disagreement with those who maintain that the use of traditional rubrics alone will be sufficient to prevent these scandals, the passages I read most gleefully were those in which he lambastes the likes of the National Catholic Reporter and the pathetic 'New Ways Ministry' for their continued applause for scumbags like Paul Shanley and Rembert Weakland.

My only disagreement is the inclusion of corrective proposals which are careful and measured (which is almost inevitable in a book so carefully crafted) - I say that the time for measured responses to this situation has passed. Their continued intransigence and smugness on these issues can lead me to no conclusion other than that Roger Mahony, George Niederauer, Robert Brom, John McCormack, William Levada, Theodore McCarrick, Harry Flynn, Bernard Law and Thomas O'Brien are SODOMITES who are PLEASED by the molestation of boys by priests as it fulfills their wish for general homosexual recruitment (a substantial percentage of boastful male "gays" and a colossal percentage of homosexual prostitutes had no inclinations toward homosexuality until their adolescent molestation began). The laity needs to rise up and tell any of these punks who still can get their fingers on their money that they will not get one plugged nickel for chanceries, cathedrals, schools or limos until they RESIGN.

(This must be going on in Mahony's lair to some degree as he is now aspiring to have a diocese made up entirely of illegal aliens who he thinks will not complain about him operating a homosexual bordello in a building with the word 'seminary' on its nameplate)

Thank you again Dr. Podles for your service to contemporary literature and your service to the faith.

Buy it here now!

Friday, July 10, 2009

Beyond Betrayal: Taking Charge of Your Life After Boyhood Sexual Abuse Review

Richard Gartner's book, his words, his depth of understanding, his ability to connect with the reader in a safe and compassionate and empowering way, is stunning. It has been like holding up a mirror to our life, to the nuances and difficulties in our marriage, to the rage and shame that my husband has lived with for decades. He has never been able to read a book on this topic until this one - Gartner speaks as though he's speaking directly to the reader. It feels as though he's written this just for you. Read this book if you are a male survivor of sexual abuse - and read it if you are a spouse or partner too. As a spouse trying to understand the complexities of these issues, this book is a life saver. I cannot recommend it highly enough. If you want one single book on this topic, choose this one. I have several others that can't even come close to the precision and insight and simplicity and understanding that exist in these pages. Thank you Richard Gartner for this gift.

Buy it here now!

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men Review

For weeks after my fiance' returned home drunk one night and began an ordeal that ended with him chasing me down the street as I screamed into the phone to a 911 operator, I wondered what had gone so wrong with my relationship. What had I done? What didn't I do? After reading this book I realized: nothing. It was not me, it was him. It wasn't that I wasn't good enough, or "fun" enough, or sexy enough and there was nothing I could have done that would have made him not cheat on me or not do drugs or any of the other things I blamed myself for.

I truly thank God I found this book. I wholeheartedly recommend it to anyone who has ever been in an abusive relationship.

Buy it here now!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

The Right Touch: A Read-Aloud Story to Help Prevent Child Sexual Abuse (Jody Bergsma Collection) Review

I absolutly loved this book!!! As with other readers, I also felt that it was a bit "much" for my 5yr old. I mean, it does say stuff like "a man putting his hands down a little girls panties..." However, even though it is a bit much, I believe that I would rather teach my daughter about these things now rather than end up with her being abused later because she didnt know what was going on. Just telling her to respect her body isnt enough. She needs to know what kinds of things to look out for and needs to be able to recognise that something bad is happening. I found this book to be tasteful and my daughter was attentive to it. I especailly like that this book points out that Mommies and Daddies should be respectful of her body too. So often you see on the news that children have been abused by their own parents. It's terrible. I loved that this book noted that EVERYONE shoudl respect her body and that only SHE has the right to share it. WAY TO GO!!!!!

Buy it here now!

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Substance Abuse: Information for School Counselors, Social Workers, Therapists, and Counselors (4th Edition) Review

I found this to be a great book for anyone who needs to know anything about the relationship between drugs and the person using the drugs. I have also read Dr. Fisher's newest book Rethinking our War on Drugs (Candid Talk about controversial issues) I found that book even better then this book. I would say anyone should read both books. I had the chance to meet Dr. Fisher and I had him sign my copy of both this book and the War on Drugs.

Buy it here now!

Monday, July 6, 2009

Group Treatment for Substance Abuse: A Stages-of-Change Therapy Manual Review

We just started a group for homeless individuals struggling with substance abuse. This book serves as a terrific guide for that group. The individuals in the group like the stages of change concept and the idea that where they are in terms of their particular stage of change is okay. The book itself provides the format for all groups. We have adapted it as needed for our population. So far the group is a real success. I highly recommend this book.

Buy it here now!

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse Workbook: Practical Exercises For Working On Problems Resulting From Childhood Abuse Review

I dont often use "self-help" workbooks with patients... but this one caught my eye for one particular client I was working with, and it turned out to be the catalyst he needed for turning everything around and begin working productively toward healing his emotional wounds. I will use this book again with other clients.

Buy it here now!

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Rethinking Substance Abuse: What the Science Shows, and What We Should Do about It Review

I'm only half way through this book but I have learned so much. It is filled with informative material, reporting on state of the art addiction information. I'm really glad I spent the money on this book. Its a hard read sometime, difficult concepts are being presented, but even though I'm a lay reader, I am able to fully understand the material.

Buy it here now!

Friday, July 3, 2009

Substance Abuse Treatment and the Stages of Change: Selecting and Planning Interventions (The Guilford Substance Abuse Series) Review

This tool is excellent if you're in the clinical field. This is great for group sessions addressing the benefits/consequences of changing behaviors related to addiction. Highly recommend it.

Buy it here now!

Thursday, July 2, 2009

The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize it and How to Respond Review

Of all books about abuse , there is no author who understands abuse better than Patricia. (Although, she blames it a bit too much on patriarchy in society. Aside from that, her book is a superbook). A great emotional healer for thoe who have been in an abusive situation in the past. Also a great book for becoming aware of & understanding abuse, in order to help out others. Her other 2 books on abuse are also must reads.

Buy it here now!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse, The: Recognizing and Escaping Spiritual Manipulation and False Spiritual Authority Within the Church Review

I chose this book upon the recommendation of a friend. As I began reading it, I began to see churches that I was familiar with described within its pages. My entire life has been spent in churches like these. No denomination is named; the abuse happens across the board.

This is a very good choice for helping people who are stuck understand where they are and how to get out. This is an excellent resource for those who are counseling the spiritually abused.

Every pastor across America should read this book and take heed.

Buy it here now!

Understanding Child Abuse and Neglect (7th Edition) (MyHelpingKit Series) Review

The book was all highlighted in certain chapters. It was false advertise like new. I wish I had spent the extra five bucks on a new one so I could made my own highlights instead of having all highlighted with different colors like in three chapters. Thank god, I only used the book twice for 2 important chapters.

Buy it here now!